Back to the Orphanage

Today we took a journey with Jadyn back to the orphanage to say goodbye and meet the caregivers. Last night was another tough night. Jadyn would fall asleep in my arms, but whenever I tried to lay her down, she would cry. I had to walk with her in my arms for hours. It reminded me of those same walks with Zach, Gabe, and Livy. There were a couple of moments yesterday when Jadyn came out of her shell a little. After lunch she was quite playful, and Nora finally got a smile out of her. She seems to be at her best after a meal, but as I said, by sleepytime, she was quite finicky. This morning, after breakfast, we boarded the bus for the hour and a half drive out to the orphanage. The countryside was a wonder to see with lots of farms, rice paddies, oxen, and field workers. Jadyn pretty much slept the whole way there. When we got there, we were allowed to see the room that she basically grew up in. It was about 15 feet across and 20 feet deep. Five cribs lined up next to each other on each wall. We saw her crib and said a very healthy GOODBYE to it. There were ten little babies in walkers scooting around the room. I had a terrible feeling that the children spent all of there time in that room in their walkers. I saw no toys and I felt that the caregivers were a little rough with the little children. I'm sure that they didn't see it that way. Nora had a chance to ask lots of questions about Jadyn and her habits and held on to her very tightly. At one point, one of the caregivers wanted to grab Jadyn to give her a hug, but Jadyn didn't reach for the caregiver. She reached for Nora, which made both of us feel a little better. After about half an hour of looking at this small room and asking questions, and taking lots of pictures and video, we did say goodbye to that place. And we were very happy to leave. Interestingly, on the way back to the hotel, Jadyn was very happy. She played with Gabe, and laughed and giggled, and was very connected and related to us. It was the first time since we got her that she was acting this way. Nora and I both felt that she was finally able to put that place behind her and begin to see that we were going to be there for her for the rest of her life. Of course, we will see how she goes to bed tonight.
Lots of love to everybody,
Adam